Friday, July 24, 2009

The Power of Virtual Friends

I've been awake since 3am at 5am I decided sleep was not going to show up and got out of bed. I rose to support and caring from some Internet friends... Thank you.

I think people underestimate the power of communication found among people connecting via the Internet. My blog has always created a sense of belonging for me, a sense, and often instantaneous feedback, that I am not the only one struggling with mental illness. I know that should be obvious, but when depression grabs hold of me my first reaction is both to isolate, and to feel alone. My blog provides me with a connection to others that I find invaluable.

I have been really struggling this past week. This morning I woke and found cookies on my virtual doorstep from Eliza Jane, a new?, or previously silent? (forgive me if my memory is mistaken) blog visitor, and another reason to live and cyber hugs, from Valerie, another Internet connection. Harriet sent me words of encouragement yesterday, and a couple days prior EJA, HBW, xthedestroyer and Harriet showed up to provide support and kind words.

This is a constant for me; "strangers", or rather cyber friends, showing up when I need a helping hand. These gifts provided me with a different perspective this morning (and do anytime friends comment). Thank you.

Throughout the past few years I have felt an incredible and truly powerful connection with many people who comment on my blog. These are people I would love to meet: People I can see are full of love and caring for their fellow human beings. I feel blessed to be a small part of each of their lives. I would jump at the opportunity to meet almost any of the people commenting on my blog.

Thanks for the support. I really appreciate it.

On another note:
...I looked up "dialectics"...just in case I was jumping to conclusions about Dr. X's use of the word...(Moi? Jump to conclusions? I am an idiot. It simply refers to an "argument"


Harriet said...

Sometimes I feel closer to internet friends than real life friends because internet friends know the "real" me. I would love to meet you too! I bet our dogs would become pals.

Anonymous said...

I have that same sense at times. I was just talking with my T the other day about how important the online community has become to me. Forgive me, for I've only just found your blog (was it private for a while?) but I've found that the internet is the only place I can be heard, speak up and not be silenced, be myself. And be accepted, for the most part ;).

how wonderful


Eliza Jane said...

Hi Aqua,

Reading your blog makes me feel much less alone. You write about things that I feel, too, but that I find very hard to articulate sometimes. I was thinking of one of your comments awhile back-- in reference to Dr. X's comment about having role models you can relate to (I can't think of how to describe it, but you know what I mean)-- and I do actually think that YOU are a role model for me. I am struggling too, but I often find it hard to relate to any people's stories about depression, because there always seems to be a "happy ending". I do not often hear about people who struggle for a long time like this. I feel so angry at myself, and my tendency is to give up/ become bitter/ stop doing things that probably WOULD help me. But I see that you struggle, and you keep trying new things-- you do not give up/ get bitter/ etc-- I really admire that. Sometimes it is just hard to live through this.

I would be sad if you weren't here, also, because your blog has helped ME through a difficult past few weeks. So thank you for that.

I live in Vancouver as well. If you want to meet you can email me-- my email address is attached to my profile. I would bring REAL cookies with me.

Cassie said...

I find that too, that people over the internet can be so supportive. I guess it's easier to express how you're really feeling to complete strangers over the internet sometimes, to people who are going through the same thing.
Even though it can feel that way, remember that you're not alone- we are here with you trying to fight through too.
Take care <3

xthedestroyer said...

at is excellent that you recognize the support system you have here. While it won't cure you, it will help alleviate the stress felt from being so depressed. As I said before, we're all sot of an extended family on the het. People with similar experiences bonding together to find a way to overcome their difficulties. You are a strong and good person, Aqua. And to see you write these upbeat words reinforces that even more. Glad to see you are feeling a bit better. You take care....

Dr Shock MD said...

You're important to us. Besides the person behind the writer you're also important to me as a source of inspiration and advice. Kind of muse;)
Admire your writing very much, not only the content but also the way in which you write.
Kind regards Dr Shock

Aqua said...

Thanks so much for the comments...they prove my point;>)You each are incredible examples of great human beings.

P.S. Eliza Jane...I will e-mail you.

Handsome B. Wonderful said...

Aqua my girl, you know how much I adore you. You're like a sister to me and I would LOVE to meet you some day though I'm a total recluse. Like, serious hermit. Ha!! But I'd come out of my cave to meet you and many others with mental illness whom I know online.

I agree with everyone else that blogs are a great support network and "group therapy" for those of us with severe mental illness. I wouldn't EVER be able to do the real group therapy because of my paranoia and delusional thinking so it's nice to be online.

I totally agree with xthedestroyer on the family comment. I don't know many in my "real life" with a mental illness let alone "normal people" who understand or who even WANT to understand.

By the way, thanks for being there for me too. :)